thesearewords

melissa informed me that i should update my blog. so here i am writing with nothing to say (or so it seems). ah but things will spill out soon enough me thinks. ha. im such a nerd. i want to go on an adventure right now. i might go for a walk even tho its late. walks at night are the best. a little scary sometimes. buuut that is part of why its nice. in the new earth theres not going to be any night because christ will be our light and he will be there forever... im worried about missing the night time. but actually nevermind. God knows us and theres not going to be anything unfull about our lives. even if i did miss night... that would be stupid because we are with God for goodness sakes. it bothers me that any part of me says thats not enough. but its so enough and way more than enough. shakessspeare. my mom and sister are talking upstairs. alli talks so much. but thats not a complaint at all. sometimes i get worn out with it but i am so grateful that shes like that... its really pleasing to me... that was an odd way to say it. but i love that shes unafraid to just talk. theres nothing in her when shes around us (unless, and i sometimes do, we shut her down with our disinterest) that says "why should i bother them" or "what makes me think they would care about what i say" i love that she feels safe. shes delightful and she can relax in that. i hope she never changes there. listening to their voices makes me happy and peacefulish. i wish... i could play piano better. its getting chilly outside...and in my house. we like sweaters and hats and gloves but the heater is not yet allowed. im cold. its ok. blah blah blah. i want to know everyone i know. i want to know all they stories and how they feel about their lives and their dreams and fears. nosy??? i dont know. maybe. agh people are just so fascinating. and beautiful and let me love themmmmm wellll.

i want a hug. i wish i could physically feel God hug me. mmm. twould be so nice. but apparently theres a better thing going on with whats really happening. i bet we would die. im sure we would die. oh well. this hugless time will seem like nothing when we are in eternity. ah that sounds trite like a hallmark card or something. sooooooooo what. cold. and my hands are dry. haha if you are reading this-im sorry. shhhhh. rehearsal tomarrow! ah tonight was fun. we got stuff done in rehearsal and then i drew all over the mirrors with a dry erase marker while listening to friends play jazz on the piano and sing and laugh and play random games and it was just sooo nice and gooood and chill. lets do it again. but then i had to clean all the mirrors again. but it was worth it. oh! and before i go- i just want to say I REALLY WANT TO BE MULTILINGUAL. that was important. it was.